I went to high school with this guy. He’s attempting (and so far succeeding) to watch the IMDB top 250 in 250 days. Every day he watches a movie and writes his opinion including ranking/year/director/starring, whats good, whats bad, if it’s deserving of it’s spot-etc. Anyways, I’ve really enjoyed reading his critiques so far, and think some more people should check it out; it may get you to watch something you haven’t heard of/considered.

“Listen Stacey. I don’t know how to tell you this, but I can’t see you anymore.”

“What? What’re you talking about? Is there someone else?”

“Well, yeah…there is”

“No, wait, I can change really, I can be like her! We can work things out and-“

“Well, maybe if you just gained a little weight and, uh, wore your pants up a little higher.”

Stacey pulls up pants

“Like this?”

“Yeah, yeah, that looks good. Now, how good are you at knitting?”

“Well, I mean I’ve tried it once or twice…”

“Yeah, and start driving that minivan around.”

“Well, I mean I don’t know if I can do that, it’s my moms so-“

“Yeah, I bet it is, and once you get the van you can give me a ride to soccer practice”

“How about we just go to the movies or-“

“DO YOU WANT THIS TO WORK OR NOT?”

“Well yeah, you know I do, it’s just”

“What? Are you gonna call my parents?”

“Uhm…I mean…maybe?”

“Oh yeah, you should call my parents, only if I’m bad though, Mrs. Smith”

“Well we could- wait….Mrs. Smith?”

Minivan door slams

“Stacey, I’m back from knitting class!”

“What the hell?! You had to have seen me, I put on my blinker a good 30 seconds before merging!”

“What?! 30 seconds my ass! How about the next time you try checking your mirrors!”

“Oh, alright, alright, this is all making sense now, is that an Obama sticker on your window?”

“Oh, you’re really going to bring politics into this? OK, ok, McCain, Palin ’08? I could almost respect you a little if it was just McCain, but you’re actually still supporting Palin after that whole Russia statement?”

“So whose tax dollars are you gonna use to fix this mistake?”

“I wouldn’t dream of taking even a cent from the American billionaires, not when you have piles lying around from the hard working middle class”

 “That’s it, I’m calling the police”

 “Go ahead, call the police, hell, call the military for all I care – oh wait, that’s right, they’re all in Iraq!”

“Why don’t you just call up your good buddies at ACORN, they should be able to make everything swing your way”

“I guess if you brought the troops home you’d just replace them oil drills any ways!”

“No you’re right, let’s just hope someone finds a way to mass produce pixie dust for our cars to run on!”

“Maybe they could use the pixie dust to keep McCain alive long enough to see the election results”

“He’s gonna need it if his health insurance is taken away”

“Alright, I’ve had enough of this, let’s just exchange information and get out of here.  I’m assuming you have identification besides your NRA papers?”

“That depends; do you have insurance that’s not government mandated?”

“Oh, your name’s Joe, why am I not surprised?”

Police car with Ralph Nader sticker pulls up

“Is everything alright here, gentlemen?”

“I love beauty. I fall in love with beautiful things, beautiful people. I’m always in love, always falling in love. I’m in love with the moon. I love abandoned buildings. I’m in love with the dress Penelope Cruz wore to the Oscars that one time. I’m in love with Christopher McCandless. Good poetry makes me cry. Women with hauntingly angelic voices, I love them too. The man who took a picture from inside the grand canyon looking up to the stars, i don’t know him, but I love him. I even love you. I love you for the way you were sitting with your hand resting on your upper lip, looking out through rain just before I walked in here. There was this heartbreaking sadness melting over you. It was so tragically beautiful. I love that too.”